Imagine if you limited yourself to just one place and experience because nothing beyond those borders could be as perfect as where you are. It is great to love your home, but if that is your only somewhere, then there's a whole lot of nowhere out there.
During the whole move process Evan and I took some time to decompress and think about the changes we were going through. One of our final nights in Apple Valley we happened upon a little park I am sad we discovered so late in our time there. But we enjoyed laying back, looking at the stars, and pondering the importance and meaning of change in our life, especially the role of space in our move and how our new space will impact who we are, how we feel, and how we will interact with it and each other.
We think we know what to expect in the move (more space, less annoyances due to cramped space, etc.) but we don't really know until we are there living in it. I think that is what is scary about a move, but also what can be exciting -- learning how we will interact and be in this new space. Where in this new house will we create new routines? Where will we greet each other when we come home in the evening? Where will we go when we want time to ourselves? When we move we leave the established space for the unknown; we must embrace this and not shy away.
Too often we tie our identity to the space we are in, binding ourselves and limiting the space we are 'allowed' to explore. I think as humans we have a tendency to cling to space we know and understand. That's why so many people settle in one area of the country, or town, and never move. We come to identify ourselves by the birds that fly nearby, by the restaurants we frequent, by the accents of the people. There is nothing wrong with that -- it is great to be proud of where you're from and enjoy all the qualities that place has to offer. And it's natural to place your identity in those things. I too feel most myself when in a space of comfort, like riding my bike under a canopy of trees on the East Coast, relaxing on the beach to the sound of seagulls and waves, or hiking in the Black Hills.
But imagine if you limited yourself to just one place because of fear or pride, never opening yourself up to change and new experiences and the chance to see how you will develop in a new space. There is a lot of space out there to explore, all with its pros and cons, benefits and limitations; our job is finding how we can enjoy being in that space. My mom once told me that my dad is good at being himself no matter where he is -- from hiking in South Dakota to walking home from work on the crowded streets of New York City (and picking some discarded furniture up along the way!), he is always comfortable and finds adventure and whatever he needs to be happy. I truly believe we can make any space our own, we can find what we need if we keep out eyes open. I may miss the quieter countryside runs I've enjoyed while living in Apple Valley, but in the cities I can run around the lakes and enjoy being a part of that energy. I may miss our big apartment window and the views it boasted of the stars, but in the cities I can enjoy our own backyard and sitting on the front steps welcoming the morning.
After our discussion in the field that night, Evan and I decided we are going to embrace the change ahead and get out there and explore! I don't want to find myself discovering a new hidden field at our new house days before our next move -- I want to find it right away. Instead of worrying about how a space isn't the way I'm used to, I am going to find where I fit in that space and how I best resonate.